Umans of Uber

Jack and Sheri were only in my car for a few minutes. I took them from the Virginia Beach Resort Hotel and Conference Center down the road to Pleasure House Brewing. But it was long enough to learn that Jack is an ordained minister. Sort of.

“Pleasure House Brewing Company. Can I come too?” I said when their destination appeared on my screen.

“Sure, if you want to attend a really awkward rehearsal dinner,” Sheri said.

“Why awkward?”

“It was announced as a black tie event, but they switched at the last minute to business casual. But only the bridal party was told about the change.”

“Yeah, I guess that might be awkward.”

“And it gets worse. The wedding tomorrow is supposed to be black tie. And we just found out it’s going to be outside.”

“They didn’t tell anyone it’s going to be outside?”

“Nope. And with all the rain we’ve been having, it’s going to be a swamp. I don’t know how girls are going to walk in heels. It’s going to be interesting. The bride and groom are both doctors. They are really smart. They’re just not very good planners.”

“Apparently.”

“I’m a fan of keeping things simple,” Jack said. “You just sign up with the Church of the Dude and get it done. No fuss.”

“What’s the Church of the Dude?”

“Have you seen The Big Lebowski?”

“Yes. I love that movie.”

“You know Jeff Bridges’s character–the Dude? There’s an actual church based on him called the Church of the Dude. You should Google it. If you apply on their website, you can become an ordained priest and then you can officiate at weddings in all fifty states. I’ve done weddings for two of my buddies. Saved them a bunch of money because I do it for free.”

“So you are a licensed priest of the Church of the Dude? I didn’t realize I had a man of the cloth in my Uber.”

“Ha. Yeah. I like to call myself a Dudeist Priest.”

“Dudeist Priest. That’s good.”

I pulled into the brewery parking lot. As they left the car, Jack said, “Seriously, being able to perform weddings has saved my friends a lot of money and hassle. It’s been a godsend.”

More like a dudesend.

“The Dude abides.” I don’t know about you, but I take comfort in that. It’s good knowing he’s out there–the Dude. Taking ‘er easy for all us sinners.

-The Big Lebowski