Dan and Helen are a young married couple I drove from one bar to another Sunday night. And they are the kind of people that make Ubering so much fun. “I put Knuckleheads as the destination,” Helen explained, “but it’s actually A.J. Gators.” “Yeah, she totally screwed it up,” Dan said facetiously. “I did not.… Continue reading 50-Year-Old Dad Jokes

Jack and Sheri were only in my car for a few minutes. I took them from the Virginia Beach Resort Hotel and Conference Center down the road to Pleasure House Brewing. But it was long enough to learn that Jack is an ordained minister. Sort of. “Pleasure House Brewing Company. Can I come too?” I… Continue reading Dudeism

As you can probably tell from my posts, I love driving for Uber. The great majority of my passengers are interesting, decent uman beings. To date, I have completed around 1,300 rides that ranged from uneventful to heartrending to hilarious. But I have always known that a horrendous ride was inevitable. Most Uber drivers have… Continue reading The Longest Ride

I could tell it was a bachelorette party the second I spotted them huddled in Rockafeller’s parking lot. They were all dressed and coiffed and bubbly with girls’-night-out gaiety. I’m not supposed to carry more passengers than I have seat belts, but I couldn’t bring myself to stifle their exuberance. They were only going a few miles to… Continue reading Cheering Up the Bride-to-Be

When I get the late night munchies, I sometimes hit an all-night drive-thru. I might grab some McDonald’s fries or a bean burrito from Taco Bell. One place I avoid, though, is 7-Eleven. Nothing looks less appetizing to me than hot dogs and taquitos spinning on rollers under heat lamps. Last night I took Allen and Tonya… Continue reading Um…Thanks

I was looking for an Irene, but a lean, black man in a black shirt was the only one waiting outside the restaurant. He hopped in, and I wondered if he just had an unusual name. “Are you Irene?” I asked. “No, that’s my mom. She got me the ride. Listen, we gonna go a… Continue reading Mommy’s Watching

Uber coincidences happen all the time. Once I picked up two passengers from Minnesota on the same day. Last week I had two umans who grew up in the same New Jersey town on consecutive days. I don’t believe this means anything, but it’s weird how often it happens. My last ride on Sunday and my… Continue reading Two to Tango